You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Randomize
