I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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