You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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