Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
