I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
