Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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