He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
