Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize