What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
