The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
