it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
