Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize
