can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
