Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
