Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
