She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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