Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize