if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
and she was petting her beer can
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
