I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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