Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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