yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
