I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
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