she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
