we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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