He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
that is very illegal...i love you.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
