would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Randomize
