OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
