She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i drank out of a bidet.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
