Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
