Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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