i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
