I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
