i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
barbara walters just said penis...
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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