i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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