i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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