For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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