I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
