Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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