What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
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