Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
