I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
