he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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