The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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