id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
