so explain again why im purple
no
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
