Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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