is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
