Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
