I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
you never un-have a 4some
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
