brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
